Days 10 and 11

Okay, another two days at one time... to be fair. Yesterday blew amazing amounts of a*s (I'll censor myself, why not?). Prior to lunch, the day was so bad, I broke down and ate McDonald's (a perfect example of irony, emotional eating, and self-flagellation if there ever was one). Then, the day just got worse, and I gotta tell you, it has to be a pretty bad day for me to get McDonald's in general.

So, here goes:

05/12/2009:

breakfast - smoothie (okay, good so far...)

lunch - McDonald's - two cheeseburgers, 6 piece nuggets, large fries, large coke, 2 apple pies (I seriously don't wonder why I'm fat)

dinner - almonds, 1 small apple, grapes, and a chocolate square

I've known for a while, but thought about it some more yesterday, I'm an emotional eater, I will sometimes eat things I know are not good, just because they make me feel better, at least for a little while. It is seriously like a drug, like I've taken a hit of something, and I feel better for a bit, but then I just feel totally sh*tty pretty soon after. What's even better. I know that I'm going to feel bad the whole time I'm eating, and, I even start becoming guilty while I'm eating the nastiness. So... once said food is in my system, the fun begins in that, I don't eat enough fast food for my body to handle that, it's almost like not drinking but once a month or so, and then binge drinking (same general results as well, except I'm not ending up in the hospital). So, I'm sacrificing later, for that short bit of comfort. The irony comes in because I was eating McDonald's, while reading the book "Fast Food Nation" which describes why McDonald's / Fast Food is basically cause for quite a bit of the evil in the world... and I didn't even laugh about it... I may have even eaten some more for dinner, but I doubt it.

05/13/2009 

breakfast - 2 doughnuts, 1 pint of milk (I know, what's the point at the food diary if all I do is get worse and worse, right?)

lunch - Subway: their new lowfat sub, Tuscan Chicken, provalone, black olives, banana peppers, green peppers, spinach, onions, one strip of the sauce that comes with it, 21oz of the 5 calorie lemonade and a bag of sun chips

dinner: chicken tortellini alfredo with onions, spinach, mushrooms and black olives, a glass milk, a bowl of raisin bran, dried cherries, dried cranberries, and some jello with fruit - at least none of the servings were overly large.

So... we'll see what happens. Well, no question yet, but soon, I hope.

Zeb